I have walked through a cemetery every day for the last six months and enjoyed every second of it.
I have always felt torn about living in downtown Toronto. One the one hand, I love the multiculturalism and excitement of living in a big city, and have been able to take advantage of the theatres, concert halls and galleries that are at my doorstep. On the other hand, I am an avid camper, hiker and horseback rider, and yearn to be away from big buildings and garish city lights.
Last spring, I decided to start looking for a condo after a giant flood and a negligent landlord made my apartment unlivable. I had to move out of the rubble, but I had grown accustomed to a wonderful lifestyle; I lived on a quiet, treed street and could walk to work in fifteen minutes. I desperately wanted to continue walking to work; I had moved closer to my school in the first place to eliminate being crammed into streetcars, subways and buses during rush hour. I also didn't want to live on the 52nd floor of a high rise, like a veal fattening in my cage, waiting for slaughter. It occurred to me that there was only one place I could live next to mature trees, walk to work and get to a subway station in 10 minutes - and that was next to the Mount Pleasant Cemetery.
In 1876, the Mount Pleasant Cemetery site north of Yonge and St. Clair was a relatively small piece of land outside of the Toronto city limits. Today it is 205 acres of tranquil beauty in the heart of Toronto's "uptown". William Lyon Mackenzie King is buried there, as are Banting and Best (the first medical practitioners to distill insulin), the Eaton family, Northrup Frye and Glenn Gould. The cemetery is threaded with paved paths, and it is used by nearby residents as a sort of park; people walk, run and bike through it, or take a book on summer days and read.
Despite all of this, I found that not everyone understood why I wanted to live next to a cemetery and, if possible, have a balcony overlooking it. "Wouldn't you be creeped out, living next to all of those graves?" they asked. "Wouldn't you be scared?" As if that isn't enough, friends of mine who bought a unit in a building down the street from me had to sign a contract that specified that if they felt that their unit was haunted because of its location, they could not sue the developers. I am not kidding about this.
Once and for all, all of you "aren't you scared?" folks , let's take a minute to think about the "worst case" scenarios for those who live near cemeteries. Clearly the worst things I would be dealing with are: Vampires, Ghosts and Zombies. I'll deal with them individually.
Vampires: As a "Buffy the Vampire Slayer" fan, I am well versed in methods of dealing with these guys. The best defense is the fact that they can't come into your house unless you invite them. Heck, they probably couldn't even get past Roger, my building's front desk concierge, who takes his job VERY seriously. My friend Graham came to visit me last weekend and it took him AGES just to get the guy to call up to verify that I was expecting a guest. There's no way that Vampy McSuckerton could get past him!
Ghosts: Ghosts are all filmy and floaty, right? If a ghost is coming after me for some reason, I doubt that my moving closer to a graveyard would make a difference - travel is a snap for them. I don't think that my condo building is built on an ancient Indian burial ground, but even if it were, I think that ghosts would be the most pissed at people in the underground parking and on the first floor; I'm all the way up on the fifth. Besides, I am sure that the whacking great condo fees I pay every month probably cover spectral malevolence.
Zombies: The issue with zombies is that they travel in large groups reminiscent of the bus tours that bring senior citizens to Toronto to see stage productions of "We Will Rock You" or "Dirty Dancing." Even if they could get past Roger, their groaning would alert me to their presence and, as they move at a speed of approximately 5mph, I could pack a bag, take a shower, make a snack and then escape on foot before they made it to my unit.
Our love of horror movies aside, why do we hang on to ridiculous fears about cemeteries? Seriously - I LOVE living next door. It is downtown green space in a city of 3 million that is not under the threat of "development." This morning I heard the first herald of spring - birds singing in the 60 year old trees just outside my bedroom window (I did get that graveyard-view balcony, by the way!) Most of all, as I walk on those paths to and from work I am struck by the symbols of love and respect that are all around me. The people who rest in Mount Pleasant Cemetery have been reduced to their organic components, but the people who designed their graves have done the very best they can to preserve the memory of a person they loved. It's a beautiful place, and I feel honored to pass through it every day.
I have always felt torn about living in downtown Toronto. One the one hand, I love the multiculturalism and excitement of living in a big city, and have been able to take advantage of the theatres, concert halls and galleries that are at my doorstep. On the other hand, I am an avid camper, hiker and horseback rider, and yearn to be away from big buildings and garish city lights.
Last spring, I decided to start looking for a condo after a giant flood and a negligent landlord made my apartment unlivable. I had to move out of the rubble, but I had grown accustomed to a wonderful lifestyle; I lived on a quiet, treed street and could walk to work in fifteen minutes. I desperately wanted to continue walking to work; I had moved closer to my school in the first place to eliminate being crammed into streetcars, subways and buses during rush hour. I also didn't want to live on the 52nd floor of a high rise, like a veal fattening in my cage, waiting for slaughter. It occurred to me that there was only one place I could live next to mature trees, walk to work and get to a subway station in 10 minutes - and that was next to the Mount Pleasant Cemetery.
In 1876, the Mount Pleasant Cemetery site north of Yonge and St. Clair was a relatively small piece of land outside of the Toronto city limits. Today it is 205 acres of tranquil beauty in the heart of Toronto's "uptown". William Lyon Mackenzie King is buried there, as are Banting and Best (the first medical practitioners to distill insulin), the Eaton family, Northrup Frye and Glenn Gould. The cemetery is threaded with paved paths, and it is used by nearby residents as a sort of park; people walk, run and bike through it, or take a book on summer days and read.
Despite all of this, I found that not everyone understood why I wanted to live next to a cemetery and, if possible, have a balcony overlooking it. "Wouldn't you be creeped out, living next to all of those graves?" they asked. "Wouldn't you be scared?" As if that isn't enough, friends of mine who bought a unit in a building down the street from me had to sign a contract that specified that if they felt that their unit was haunted because of its location, they could not sue the developers. I am not kidding about this.
Once and for all, all of you "aren't you scared?" folks , let's take a minute to think about the "worst case" scenarios for those who live near cemeteries. Clearly the worst things I would be dealing with are: Vampires, Ghosts and Zombies. I'll deal with them individually.
Vampires: As a "Buffy the Vampire Slayer" fan, I am well versed in methods of dealing with these guys. The best defense is the fact that they can't come into your house unless you invite them. Heck, they probably couldn't even get past Roger, my building's front desk concierge, who takes his job VERY seriously. My friend Graham came to visit me last weekend and it took him AGES just to get the guy to call up to verify that I was expecting a guest. There's no way that Vampy McSuckerton could get past him!
Ghosts: Ghosts are all filmy and floaty, right? If a ghost is coming after me for some reason, I doubt that my moving closer to a graveyard would make a difference - travel is a snap for them. I don't think that my condo building is built on an ancient Indian burial ground, but even if it were, I think that ghosts would be the most pissed at people in the underground parking and on the first floor; I'm all the way up on the fifth. Besides, I am sure that the whacking great condo fees I pay every month probably cover spectral malevolence.
Zombies: The issue with zombies is that they travel in large groups reminiscent of the bus tours that bring senior citizens to Toronto to see stage productions of "We Will Rock You" or "Dirty Dancing." Even if they could get past Roger, their groaning would alert me to their presence and, as they move at a speed of approximately 5mph, I could pack a bag, take a shower, make a snack and then escape on foot before they made it to my unit.
Our love of horror movies aside, why do we hang on to ridiculous fears about cemeteries? Seriously - I LOVE living next door. It is downtown green space in a city of 3 million that is not under the threat of "development." This morning I heard the first herald of spring - birds singing in the 60 year old trees just outside my bedroom window (I did get that graveyard-view balcony, by the way!) Most of all, as I walk on those paths to and from work I am struck by the symbols of love and respect that are all around me. The people who rest in Mount Pleasant Cemetery have been reduced to their organic components, but the people who designed their graves have done the very best they can to preserve the memory of a person they loved. It's a beautiful place, and I feel honored to pass through it every day.
this is a great piece of writing.. I'm your number 1 fan....mary
ReplyDeleteI love the fact that all those years of Buffy watching has not been wasted on you and you actually know how to defend yourself against ghosts, vampires, demons and zombies. I thought for sure though that you would have cited some x-files or politely requested that our dear friend Mr. Duchovany promptly move in with you to aid in your protection. But then I got to thinking - who really needs protection in this case when they are up against Ms. Hunter? Why the answer is so clear - the very things that may in fact be the source of fear - the ghosts, vampires, demons and zombies. They don't stand one freaking chance in this living hell against Al. They obviously have forgotten that Ms. Hunter has a very secret identity and that would be of WONDER WOMAN!!!! With that slinky unitard (haha I said tard) and the bullet proof bracelets and lets not forget the golden lasso of truth those evil beasties don't stand a chance. I applaud your stand in acquiring a wonderful condo overlooking a green space that just so happens to have dead people buried there. I would walk proud through there with you for I know I will be safe.
ReplyDeletefantastic writing - one day, when I'm back in Canada, you'll have to take me on a walk through the cemetery. I like them too, and if that makes me weird then...well, no surprise really.
ReplyDeleteLiz x
I was wondering...is it cheaper to buy a condo in downtown T.O. or a plot in Mount Pleasant Cemetary?? Or do they cost approx. the same.....1 bijillion dollars (yeah I said bijillion). Or maybe they both cost 1 kajillion dollars?
ReplyDeleteIsn't the cemetary technically your backyard now? So when you kick the bucket, just leave in your will that you want to be buried in your backyard and then you can rest in peace next to Timothy Eaton (although I'd rather be buried with Alex P. Keaton).
Okay, but don't come crying to me if you get turned into a brain-sucking zombie and need somebody to decapitate you.
ReplyDeleteOh and, damn girl, you *can* write. Genuine warmth and wit. The Hunter Gene, I think.
ReplyDeleteJust looked up your blog and love getting to hear my ranchy friend spout off regularly! I do miss those random passing comments in the corral that would crack me up. My only question, (well at this point anyway)... do they offer any sort of package deal? You know, condo/cemetary plot? You could go lie down in the green grass of your final resting place and think about life. Ooh... is that one of those thoughts I should have kept to myself?
ReplyDelete